I think a big part of coming to terms with Asperger’s is about accepting that the way you react to things is a function of the way you are wired.

This means that it’s pretty much inevitable that if you have AS, you are going to make faux pas when speaking with people, and that from time to time people are going to take offence.

The key aspect to all of this for me these days is that I’m not setting out to be rude or objectionable – and that’s what’s important, regardless of how I end up coming across.

I can always apologise for things I’ve said, and if the person involved has known me for any length of time, then they half expect me to make faux pas or interject with odd left-field facts anyway, despite them not knowing I have AS.

James

It’s good to hear that others experience broadly the same thing as me.

I get idea triggers like yours too, but as you say, you have to either write them down or hope you’ll remember later.

The compulsion to say something when an idea strikes in this way is much less than when I want to impart information. For some reason, it feels really important to blurt out the information that’s suddenly at the front of my mind, despite it usually having no importance.

I do something similar. My mind works associatively. I can be talking with my husband and something he says brings up an association, rather like your wife talking about the photos brought up the association of the camera.

I can easily go off on a tangent about the association, but I can also restrain myself. It depends. If the association is intellectual or emotional, I feel more comfortable about changing the direction of the conversation, because that seems to be within the realm of what’s appropriate.

However, if it’s about something mundane, I get stuck. I know I shouldn’t interrupt the conversation, but I’m afraid I’ll forget the thing I just remembered. This seems to have a lot to do with my working memory rather than getting distracted by a special interest. So I’ll get anxious about it and kind of half listen to the other person while trying to imprint the other thing on my mind. With my husband, I can sometimes just say, “You know, could you just give me a second to write something down?” and that’s fine with him. With others, I try to let the thing float away, and if I remember it later, all well and good.