The perfect cover story
I’ve ended up in the profession that gives me the perfect cover story for my AS.
I stumbled into it many years before I even knew what AS was, mostly out of luck. I work in IT, and more specifically as a Systems Administrator. If you don’t know much about this field, then you probably don’t know the significance of me having this sort of role.
I’m sure you’ll have heard of the term geek, however. Geeks work in IT. They are solitary creatures who like to sit in darkened rooms, preferably on their own, and spend their working day tapping away at a large bank of computers that tower over their desk. They keep odd hours, often rising and then working late. They are usually single, and almost invariably have poor social skills. At least, that’s the stereotype.
That sounds rather like someone with AS, doesn’t it?
I think it does, and I’m sure that some proportion of those that behave like a typical geek do have AS, or some other Autism Spectrum condition.
The majority don’t though.
I’m sure of this, because geeks may appear to be like me, but actually, the superficial comparison is as far as it goes. Most of the geeks I know are actually quite sociable, and of the proportion that aren’t, most simply have poor social skills through being hopelessly addicted to computers to the point of not interacting much with real people. I think I can spot those on the Autism Spectrum pretty accurately these days because I know the signs to look out for, and I can usually see when camouflage is in use. Geeks do not, as the norm, have AS.
Having thought back across my 14 years of work in the field, I reckon maybe 1 in 10 IT people have an Autism Spectrum condition, though perhaps 1 in 4 of them at least loosely meet the stereotypes associated with geekery.
In each job I’ve had, I’ve quickly been accepted by the geeks as being one of them. I’m not though.
My AS traits mean that I fit the stereotype. It’s the perfect cover. As long as I’m careful to deploy my usual camouflage at least most of the time, then I’m simply seen as another geek, and I don’t have to explain away any of my convention-breaking behaviours to other the geeks, or even to management.
I’ve also noticed that geeks often have a cruel streak, and an almost pack-like behaviour. This is an area where I’m most definitely not one of them. From the comfort of a private chat room, I’ve seen decent people ripped to shreds simply to provide entertainment. The act is cowardly, with the victim never in the chat room at the time. I find this behaviour intolerable, but I also have to be honest and say that I’ve often gone along with it, to protect my cover. After all, without my geek ‘friends’, what friends would I have left?
Not many. But that’s another story.
Related posts:
- An allegorical story Perhaps the most visible aspect of my Asperger’s – if...
